Imposter? Swine flu?

"My mom called and said they want us to buy a table for our anniversary gift, and they'll pay for it," says Hubby.

"That's good." Our last patio table was levitated during a bad windstorm last winter. It moved a few feet across the space and the top shattered into a million pieces. Unfortunately, the Bookies were outside at the time; Surprise is still afraid of wind.

"Our anniversary is coming up. When is it?"
"Did you really just ask me that?"
"Well, at least I know what month it's in!"
"Come on. Just TRY."
"May 22nd?"
"No."
"May 35th?"
"There's an invitation, framed, right down the hall."
"Do I really have to get up and walk down the hall? Can't you just tell me? So anyway, what do you want to do for our anniversary?"
Do? Does he mean, like, leave the house?
"I was thinking maybe the kids are ready for Charleston," he says.
Wow. Leave the house for more than an hour! Who is he, and what has he done with my husband? Is it the swine flu?
"That would be good, you mean like a weekend? Might be kind of far for a weekend."
"Yeah, that's true. Maybe we can save Charleston for vacation in the summer."
Vacation?
"Do you have a fever?"
"Huh?"
"Nevermind. How about DC? Or Baltimore? Or New York?
We decide on Baltimore, probably. For a weekend. Out of the house. And save Charleston (where we honeymooned) for vacation. Vacation?! Wow.
Wow.